Simply Syphilis

A good friend of mine occasionally and quite affectionately calls me a ‘syphilitic whore’ when she is amused and irritated with me. That is the origin for that phrase. I do not know where she got it from, but it sure does sound cute. Syphilitic whore. If you really think deep and say it aloud, one gets a very warm fuzzy feeling, all the happy centres lighting up in the grey matter. Think about it. It rather defeats the purpose of an insult, don’t you think?
Of course, penicillin killed syphilis, if not the whore. So although syphilis may still exist, and whores are rampant, the two are rarely seen together. Even if they are, they are soon divorced. Stupid penicillin.
See, its very simple. If you have syphilis, you won’t get it again, right? Then what is so bad about syphilis? The only thing it can do in the long run is make you mad. They call it GPI- general paresis of the insane. Whatever. Medical terminology bores me. They are just saying you will go mad. So, that will anyway happen, right? Who isn’t mad? Everyone is. If you have any doubts, go ask Tom Cruise. So why blame poor syphilis for that? Those lovely little curly organisms! How can you be mad at them?
Alternatively, we could think of it this way. Someone is stoic, expressionless, humorless and very sad. Let him see a syphilitic whore, do the business, get them spirochetes into his bloodstream, and up into the csf, wait a couple of years for GPI to set in, and he wont be all that stoic, and expressionless and boring anymore. He would be insane. Or in this case, sane. Sanity and insanity can be interchangeable, right?

A syphilitic whore can never be boring. Whores never bore. Show me one boring whoring syphilis, and I will lend you an arm. Also, bores are never whores. They may rhyme, but they are never the same. Remember that. Whoring bores and Boring whores are virtually nonexistent. Both theoretically, and practically speaking. If anyone says he has seen them, he is hallucinating, and urgently needs syphilitic treatment.
Atleast a syphilitic whore stands a greater chance of bedding Captain Jack Sparrow, than any normal female in the reproductive age group. Whatever. There are many who may consider that to be the biggest achievement in their lives. True story. And please do not be judgmental. Has a whore, or a spirochete, or a syphilitic whore, or any of the above combination ever discriminated in choosing an able, wise recipient? Its always an indiscriminate action, left to chance and the randomness, chaos and entropy of the universe. So, don’t, okay?

Why, it could even be a new religion! New members will be recruited, and the sect shall spread far and wide. It need not necessarily be a vice. And then, the non syphilitic whores will be looked down upon, rejected, stepped and stampeded on, put in concentration camps, and yet the world shall not end. Of course, it will and should be a matriarchal society. Or should it? I wonder what the gender distribution for the SW population is. Whatever. Syphilis rules, either way. Who cares what the gender of the vehicle is. We don’t really bother if the Mercedes Benz is male or female, right? I think the same analogy should apply here.
What if the non syphilitic race becomes extinct? What If there’s a war between the syphilitic and the non syphilitic population? Who will be the fittest? Evolution of the syphilitic whore. In this age, with HIV thronging the limelight, and poor syphilis pushed to the background, these are issues we seriously need to think about.
When I asked a few people what they thought about syphilitic whores, not many could think of an answer. Why, nobody said anything. Nevertheless, it got me wondering. It is a nice question to rape someone’s happiness. Considering I am an excellent candidate for that, this is how I visualize the rape.
Prof: Ma, what do you think of syphilitic whores?
Me: sir?
Prof: Syphilitic whores, ma? What you think?
Me: syphilitic whores, sir?
Prof: Tell me fast, I don’t have all day. < irritated expression >
Me: Sir, actually, it refers to a person who has syphilis… and…
Prof: Ma, I wish you would make up your mind about it. This wont do. Its ridiculous that you know so little. How difficult is the question? Cant you read up and come?
Me: Sir, wont her career be ruined?
Prof: Which book? Which book says that? Give me the reference.
Me:
Warning- The above stunt should be tried out only under highly strict experimental conditions and by people well trained in carrying out such maneuvers. In amateur hands, it can backfire and be potentially hazardous to the very sanity of life. It is a thin line.

Frankly speaking, I cannot imagine a world without them. I mean syphilis. Oh, and of course the whores. Therefore, a syphilitic whore is indeed a rare entity, close to extinction. It is my personal belief that we should do all it takes to save the race. And the next time someone calls you a syphilitic whore, it should make your day, for it’s a compliment! Long live the spirochetes!